Finding Joe

*Originally published on my Wordpress blog 03.29.2021

 “I don’t believe people are looking for the meaning of life as much as they are looking for the experience of being alive.”     Joseph Campbell

I have watched the documentary Finding Joe three times over the last couple of years. Every time I watch it I learn something new and I am inspired in some new direction. Finding Joe is an engaging and accessible introduction to Joseph Campbell. Campbell was an American teacher and philosopher known especially for his work in comparative mythology. His best known work is his book The Hero With a Thousand Faces in which he delineates different mythologies. His best known point of reference is probably his exhortation to “follow your bliss”.

In the documentary, a collection of well known Campbell devotees and scholars provide information to help shed light on some of his most inspiring work. The film opens with the metaphor of the Golden Buddha. The people of the village had covered the statue of the Golden Buddha in mud and concrete to protect it from the approaching enemy army. The statue then stayed covered for years until one day a piece of mud fell off and the villagers realized that there was a golden Buddha under the mud.

The metaphor is that each of us is golden by nature. We were born golden. We were born knowing every great spiritual path. We were one with the Christ, with the Buddha, with all the gods of the Universe. Then we went to school. In school they said, “You have to dress like this. This is what boys do. This is what girls do. This is what black people do and this is what white people do. This is what Catholics do, this is what Jewish people do and on and on”. So, like the Golden Buddha, we developed a casing of stone over the gold. We came to believe that we were the stone Buddha and not the Golden Buddha.

But then, the metaphor continues, something comes along that cracks our casing, something that really scares us. Maybe we lose our job, or get divorced, or our home is repossessed, or someone we love dies. The experience knocks off a piece of our armor. Only then do we become aware of a hint of gold under the casing. Now we can imagine the Golden Buddha. All we will ever want to do after that is pick away at the stone because the gold is so much more interesting and attractive. But, something has to knock that first piece of mud off so that we can see the gold. That’s life. Adversity can bring valuable experience and knowledge, if we are paying attention.

“We must be wiling to get rid of the life we’ve planned , so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”   Joseph Campbell

Bad things happen and you survive. You are who you are, in part, because you survived. You had to face that bad thing, that challenge, the tragedy. You had to wrestle with it, accept it, acknowledge it, and sometimes forgive as a result. You had to endure that most difficult thing but it also came with a kind of understanding. It came with a payoff because you learned and your life became bigger. This supports the truth that it’s not what happens to us, it’s what we do with what happens to us that matters.

The most significant notion I took away from this recent viewing of the documentary was that, if you want a big life, you are going to have to stretch. This is not new to me, of course, but it’s hitting me at a good time. I’m ready for this notion now. What gets in the way of stretching? Fear. Fear, in all its forms, will stop us in our tracks. Fear is learned and is an inherent part of the human experience. What we need is the courage to move forward despite the fear. You employ courage when you know what to do and you do it. You lack courage when you know what to do and you don’t do it.

The thing about courage is that you have to exercise it routinely. You have to consistently face fears to grow courage. It’s easy to turn away (or even run away) when fear shows up and it’s perfectly okay to be scared. Fear is a healthy warning but it doesn’t have to stop you.

Of course, Campbell was not the first to say this, but it resonated for me this time. Stretch yourself. Do something that scares you. And I’m not thinking, for me anyway, of something that is risky or unsafe. When I think of doing something that scares me, I think of it as doing something new, and, consequently, uncomfortable. I think about going a new way, venturing along a new path.

I have been wondering what kinds of things I can do that are out of my ordinary comfort zone. The pandemic makes it more complicated but the scary thing doesn’t have to be a big thing. I simply want to find out how it feels to consciously make that choice to do something that scares me. I want to try that out frequently. I want to get in the habit of being uncomfortable.

I honestly don’t know if I can, though. It’s something to aspire to but can I pull it off? I remember about five years ago, I took myself to a yoga class. I had been curious about attending a regular yoga class but I also felt self conscious and a bit foolish. I didn’t know the routine at the studio, I didn’t want to be a newbie, I didn’t want to be awkward. But I went anyway. That took courage. I made myself go back repeatedly. It literally took months of going twice a week before I felt comfortable but eventually I got there. That’s a good example for me to remember. I did it then. I can do it again.

One of the narrators in Finding Joe talks about how, on our deathbed, the greatest regret is not the risks we took or the opportunities we seized or even the times when we went out on limb and looked rather silly. No, the greatest regrets center more on the risks we didn’t take, the opportunities we didn’t seize, the times we didn’t look silly. That’s worth remembering for me.

One of the closing comments in the film is this: “All that matters at the end of the day is how well you showed up and how courageous you were". I am the author of my own story, right? I decide how big my life will be. At this point, I have had some of the richest experiences life has had to offer. I am not ready to stop gaining those experiences. I don’t want to shrink just because I am also aging. There’s still room in me for stretching. The tasks of younger life have been completed: basic education, work that mattered, creation of family and sustaining family of origin. Now, I have the time and resources to be bold and experimental. I can show up for life and maybe not simply sleep my way to the end. I CAN show up but will I?

***Here’s a link to the video on YouTube:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s8nFACrLxr0